Why Play is Essential for a Secure, Lasting Relationship?
When was the last time you and your partner truly played together—no screens, no distractions, just laughter, curiosity, and connection? If you’re like most couples, life gets busy, and “fun” can sometimes take a backseat to responsibilities. But here’s the thing: Play isn’t just for kids. In fact, bringing more playfulness into your relationship can strengthen your bond, improve communication, and keep the intimacy alive.
As a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist specializing in young adult relationships, I'm passionate about helping couples find engaging, creative ways to deepen their connection. I recently had the pleasure of sharing my thoughts on this very topic with Women’s Health Magazine. Here want to expand on why playing games as a couple is one of the best things you can do for your relationship—and which ones I personally recommend!
Why Games Are More Than Just Fun?
Whether it’s a board game, a conversation card deck, or an interactive challenge, playing together as a couple does something special for a relationship. Here are some reasons why:
It Strengthens Emotional Intimacy: Games that encourage storytelling or vulnerability help couples feel seen and heard in a new ways. When you engage in deep conversations or share memories, you create stronger emotional ties and understand your partner in new, deeper ways.
It Brings Back Playfulness: After the sweet “honeymoon phase” is over, relationships can feel a little too serious, dry or routine-driven. Playing games adds an element of lighthearted fun. Laughter and shared experiences can remind you why you fell in love in the first place.
It Improves Communication: A lot of the couples I see in my practice express how they only “really” communicate during couples therapy sessions. They are afraid of being vulnerable without the security of a therapist as a mediator. Many relationship games encourage the same active listening and meaningful discussions that couples experience in therapy. So, they are a great way to improve communication and express thoughts and feelings in a safe, and engaging way.
It Fosters Teamwork: Whether you're solving a challenge together or answering deep questions, you’re building problem-solving skills as a couple. That sense of “we’re in this together” can extend beyond game night into real-life situations. In the end, intimacy is really about togetherness.
How to Choose the Right Game for Your Relationship?
Before picking a game, it’s important to consider what do you want to get out of it. Are you looking to spark meaningful conversations? Open a space of vulnerability that it’s hard to find in your day-to-day tile? Reignite passion? Simply have fun?
Here are a few factors to keep in mind that will help you choose the right game for you:
Your Relationship Goals: Some games are perfect for deep emotional connection, while others are great for boosting playfulness. Choose one that aligns with what you and your partner need.
Comfort Level: Some games dive into intimate or vulnerable topics, while others are lighthearted and humorous. Pick one that suits your personalities or lenel of comfort.
Interactivity: The best games encourage engagement rather than passive participation. So, opt for ones that require both of you to be present and involved.
Variety & Replayability: A good game keeps things fresh, and fun. Choose one that allows you to come back to it and still have fun over time.
Tone & Style: Whether you’re into flirty, competitive, or thought-provoking games, there’s definitely something out there that fits your dynamic!
My Top Game Recommendations for Young Couples
Where Should We Begin – A Game of Stories by Esther Perel
Created by one of my personal favorite relationship experts in the whole world! This game helps couples explore storytelling and meaningful conversations, fostering vulnerability and deep connection. I admire her work so much. The design is also beautiful and would go great on any living room!The Adventure Challenge: Couples Edition
This interactive book gives you mystery date ideas that encourage spontaneity, teamwork, and shared experiences to break up routine and bring excitement back into your relationship. Another good one!Let’s Get Deep
A question-based game with different levels of depth, starting from lighthearted prompts to more intimate discussions. Great for both new and long-term couples looking to enhance communication. This one is very interactive and comes with different versions like “Afterdark Expansion” and “Date Night Dice”Our Moments: Couples
A simple yet impactful card-based conversation game designed to spark insightful discussions and strengthen your bond. Simple, but powerful. Maybe a good options for partners who are easily intimidated.Love Lingual: Couples Edition
Inspired by therapy techniques, this card game encourages meaningful discussions across five key relationship areas: family, intimacy, couple dynamics, past & future, and personal beliefs. This one also comes in different versions, depending on what you are looking for.
The Takeaway
Prioritizing play in your relationship isn’t just fun—it’s essential. When we engage in activities that spark laughter, conversation, and connection, we’re actively investing in our relationship’s longevity and health. I strongly believe that the best game is not the one who has the best reviews but the one that aligns with your relationship goals and brings you both joy.
So, what game are you trying first? Let me know—I’d love to hear how it goes! And if you’re looking for more ways to strengthen your relationship, we are here for you! Our team of empowering couples therapists is passionate about helping young couples in NYC explore more resources, offer personalized guidance, and help you better understand the underlined issue causing your relationship issues. Reach out to us today to know how we can help you!
