Inspired by my interview with Health Magazine

Why Pets Can Feel Like Lifelines, Not Just Companions

In therapy, there’s a kind of pause I often witness. The moment a client mentions their pet. Their voice softens. Their nervous system seems to calm down, and more than once, tears follow, not always from grief, but from a feeling of deep, wordless gratitude.

That’s what animals can do. They don’t fix our pain, but they stay with us in it.

In a recent interview with Health Magazine, I was asked to reflect on a study exploring the connection between pet ownership and psychological well-being. What stood out to me the most was this: pet companionship was shown to offer similar mental health benefits to romantic relationships or even increases in income. For me, and for many of the women I work with, this wasn’t just interesting research. It was deeply validating.

As someone who spent 18 years with my own dog, Ringo, the emotional impact of that bond is something I’ve felt personally and witnessed professionally over and over again.

What the Research Says (And Why It Matters)

The study’s most powerful contribution lies in the way it quantifies something we’ve long felt: that pets aren't just a comfort, they’re a connection. One that, for many, compares to the support of close friendships or romantic partners.

The researchers equated the psychological benefits of pet ownership to economic value. That might seem strange at first, but from a mental health advocacy perspective, it’s meaningful. When emotional well-being is framed in monetary terms, it becomes easier for policy-makers and institutions to recognize its importance, just like we do for access to healthcare, job stability, or housing.

But beyond the numbers, the study validates something more emotional:

That a pet’s presence can raise life satisfaction.
That animals meet relational needs we sometimes don’t even have words for.
That being emotionally attached to a pet is not just normal, it’s healing.

Why Pets Are Especially Powerful for Women Navigating Anxiety and Trauma

In my work with Gen Z and Millennial women in New York, I often hear clients describe their pets as the only thing in their lives that feels safe and reliable.

This is especially true for women who:

Grew up in emotionally neglectful or unpredictable households
Are healing from trauma, betrayal, or emotionally unavailable relationships
Experience high-functioning anxiety or people-pleasing patterns
Are diagnosed with Complex-PTSD

A pet, in these contexts, becomes more than a companion. They become a grounding presence, a consistent, nonjudgmental source of touch, attention, and relational rhythm.

Clinically, this bond has real neurological effects. The presence of a pet has been shown to:

Lower cortisol (stress hormone)
Increase oxytocin (bonding and soothing hormone)
Promote nervous system regulation and emotional safety

That’s why so many clients say things like:

“My dog knows when I’m spiraling. She curls up beside me before I even realize what’s happening.”
“My cat keeps me anchored. Feeding her is sometimes the only routine I can manage when I’m depressed.”

These aren’t sentimental statements. They’re markers of connection and nervous system repair.

The Study’s Limitations

The research, while incredibly illuminating, doesn’t capture everything. For example, it doesn’t account for pet type (a dog’s emotional impact may differ from a bird or fish), attachment style between person and pet, or mental health conditions that may shape the role of the pet in daily life.

Also important: pets require energy, time, and financial resources. For some people, especially those in crisis or without consistent support, taking on a pet may be more stressful than supportive. And that’s okay.

What this study does show is that for those who are emotionally and logistically ready, animal companionship can offer an incredibly powerful source of well-being, especially in emotionally disconnected or overstimulating environments like NYC.

Pets Invite Us Into Relational Healing

If you’ve ever felt like your pet is your emotional anchor, you're not imagining it. For many of us, pets meet core relational needs we don’t always receive from people. For example:

Being noticed without needing to explain
Being touched without pressure
Being cared for without having to perform

They offer a type of connection that’s quiet, physical, and deeply stabilizing. They mirror something we’re often taught to suppress: our need to be nurtured.

In therapy, I often talk to clients about “earned secure attachment.” Pets can be part of that journey, helping us learn that closeness doesn’t have to come with judgment, inconsistency, or fear.

A Note From My Practice

If you’re someone who talks to your dog more than your friends, or who feels calmer just by hearing your cat breathe, you’re not alone. And there’s nothing trivial about that connection.

Pets can be part of your healing story. They offer a model of connection that’s safe, attuned, and emotionally present.

If you're navigating anxiety, trauma, or chronic self-doubt, and want support in understanding your emotional needs more fully, therapy can help. Whether you’re processing grief, stress, or simply trying to reconnect with yourself, we want to hear from you. Reach out to us below.

Why Pets Feel Like Home: How Animal Companionship Boosts Mental Health